Posted in love, Romance, Uncategorized

Birthday

The café was busy as usual. Dhruv exchanged the bill for the coffee.

“No sugar, please!”

Dhruv took his coffee and walked towards the deserted table at the corner of the shop.

He settled on one of the tables and took out his laptop. The review went bad and the panel had asked him to re work on his proposal. Work pressure, sleepless nights, empty feeling all ensured a rough couple of weeks for him. Nirvana’s ‘About a Girl’ played over the speakers.

The team has now become entirely dependent on Dhruv, as if he was the only one in it. Others never batted an eye. Since the ‘ship’ has to reach somewhere, Dhruv has been pulling his own weight to get everything right and also his next promotion heavily depended on this project. Almost an hour passed when Dhruv was finally done with his reworked proposal and looked up from the laptop screen. Dhruv saw Abha walking in. Dhruv felt disturbed, but it was nothing compared to what he felt during the beginning. He looked away to avoid making an eye contact.

“……..take advantage while you hang me out to dry…….” on went the song in the background.

Nothing has been the same since that day. Dhruv still had no answer with him when asked why have they split up. Sometimes it is better to leave some questions unanswered, Dhruv thought. It has been a difficult task, moving on, because you cannot tolerate the pain of someone being taken away from you. There was this empty feeling inside him,which has not healed, yet.

Abha walked towards Dhruv’s table and sat opposite to him. Burying the excitement deep inside, Dhruv looked up. After a long time, they looked into each others eyes. Dhruv felt as if the clock has stopped ticking. Everything came to a sudden pause. Abha was looking at Dhruv, who was gaping at her. She snapped her fingers which pulled Dhruv back onto the ground.

“Why have you come?” asked Dhruv.

“I know things have not been that good between us, but I need to talk” She said.

“Why don’t we get something to eat?” She said, raising from her seat.

“Sit there. I’ll get something.” Dhruv said and walked towards the food counter.

Abha watched him walking briskly with a grim face. A lot of emotions rushed through her mind. She remembered how they used to be, how nice a guy Dhruv had been, how rude she had become. She felt a lump in her throat, her eyes moist with tears. She wiped her face and watched Dhruv.

A few minutes later he came back with Grilled Sandwiches, her favourite. Abha’s face beamed,he still had’nt forgotten.

“So, you haven’t forgotten.” She smiled

“How can I ?” Dhruv asked.

She offered a piece to him. They ate in silence. Dhruv didn’t feel like eating. The feeling was all over him again. He recollected the day they broke up, for which she never had a reason. Life had become a hell for him during those days. Dhruv looked out of the window.

“Aren’t you eating?” Abha asked.

“I don’t feel like eating” said Dhruv playing with the food.

They didn’t talk. Silence lingered. They had a lot to talk, but words stood away. They sat bearing the painful yet alluring silence. Abha was the first to break the ice.

“So, how’s everything?” asked Abha.

“Nothing new. Same mundane life.” Dhruv said.

“Why don’t we take a walk, Dhruv?” Abha asked, almost as if she sensed Dhruv’s disturbed self.

How he cherished all those walks with her. He didn’t have to pretend to be someone in front of her. However draining his work would get,he always knew there was always something liberating to look forward to. It has been almost a year since their last walk. How much he needed this.

Dhruv nodded.

“…….no I can’t see you every night, free………..” Cobain’s voice faded as they left the coffee shop.

It was a beautiful evening. The air was filled with the fragrance of freshly bloomed lavender. Spring had just birthed fresh life into the dormant flora of the city. Dhruv walked with Abha besides him. They headed for the park nearby overlooking the harbor. There was a tangible excitement about the place, children running around,birds chirping, elders on their evening strolls .They headed on towards the boardwalk. The sun was about to set. The sky was painted orange.Perfection.

“Dhruv..” Abha started.

“I know what I have done and there has never been a day I had not regretted my actions. Sometimes all we are, are a bunch of screw-ups.” She paused fighting back her tears.

“I know apologizing is easy and not even a thousand sorries would be enough to make it up for what you had to go through.” Abha said.

Dhruv looked into her eyes. They were red now.

“I’ve made my fair shares of mistake Dhruv. Only when I lost you, did I realise your worth. I want you back in my life.” Abha stopped. She couldn’t resist from crying. She covered her face with her arms, then wiped it and looked at Dhruv. Dhruv was looking into the sky. The birds were flying away, the sun had alredy gone halfway into the sea.

Abha felt Dhruv’s fingers over her’s. Dhruv turned and looked into her eyes. Deep down the abyss, Dhruv saw her burning love for him. Dhruv walked towards the railing and stood there. He felt Abha’s breath behind his neck. Her arms clutched his. Dhruv turned around and pulled her into him.

“Promise me you’ll never leave me again.” Dhruv said.

“No… I” She couldn’t talk.

Their eyes locked. His lips touched hers. Abha hid her face in his chest. She felt complete.

“And Dhruv, Happy Birthday!” she said.

Posted in Imaginative, love, poetry, Romance, thoughts, Uncategorized

Cold Night

In those cold winter nights,

When the whole world slept,

I gazed up to the stars.

What kept me awake?

I don’t know

The cold wind surrounded me.

I flew away

To infinity and beyond; I kept flying,

Until I reached you.

I found you,

As pure as the morning dew.

The sun that shines through the darkest night,

What took you so long?

Posted in Imaginative, love, Romance, Uncategorized

To Infinity and Beyond


Those were the days I still keep close to my heart. Each moment we spent together, I should say was purely magical.

I can go on describing you and the moments we shared, but I come to a point where I completely run out of words. Every relationships have seen ups and downs. We have seen it too, but ultimately its fire that makes iron the strongest.

You are my moon and stars, you are the dreams I see, you are the songs I sing, you are the  stories I write, you are my day and night, you are my everything.

The day when I asked you to be mine, I wanted it to be a surprise. But you surprised me by  asking “When have I not been ? I don’t know what brought us together, but one thing I know for sure. Nothing can part us anymore. They say gods have already decided our fate. But what is fate other than the decisions we take and the judgments we make.

We’ve decided ours; “To infinity and beyond”

Posted in Article, Imaginative, love, Romance, thoughts, Uncategorized

Silence

Finally everything was over – from best friends to perfect strangers; that’s what time has made us into. You can put in the last drop of effort into it, but the result may or may not be what we expect it to be.

What have I done ?

Confessed that I love you more than anything in this world. I know I cannot make you love me if you don’t, but I’m sure I haven’t done anything wrong to you. The only thing I have ever done is make you feel special,make you realize how special you are to me. If proposing you was the mistake I have done,and that’s the reason you’re keeping me away then consider it my first and last.

You have seen me in my ups and downs as well, you knew me in and out.There was nothing in my life that I have kept hidden from you. You know how you felt when you were with me. I still cherish the moments I spent with you. And you know what ? I miss them like hell!

The talks we had, the songs you used to sing for me, everything has come to an end. It’s like reality has slapped on my face waking me up from my dream.

I used to look deep into your beautiful eyes behind those nerdy glasses. I always wanted to nuzzle your forehead and move away that pane of hair which fell on your face. I wanted to be your reason to smile, but all I’ve become is the reason for your endless silence.

It is as if all those moments we shared was a joke. Because a single thing I’ve said has become the reason for my biggest loss.The crack it made cannot be filled. The emptiness you’ve created cannot be filled and you who walked away from me cannot be replaced.

Even after all those things you said the other day, I still love you. I know you’ll never be mine. You made it clear. I wanted a reason, but I didn’t ask you for any. Because I couldn’t bare anything other than a ‘Yes’. Yes, I shouldn’t have kept my hopes high. It must be the ‘vibe’ we once shared that made me do all those ‘Deductions’ in my head.

I know I have to move on, but this mind is not letting me. It keeps showing me those memories in a loop.With all that pain buried deep inside, I put on a smile on my face.

Yes,I was hurt,wounded,bleeding profusely.But the fact that you never felt the way I felt was even more painful. It is killing me from inside. Those memories still haunt me.

I wont ask you to be mine or love me the way I love you. But I still can love you. That’s the only thing I can or will do. My love for you was unconditional,whether it was requited or unrequited.

 

Posted in Romance

A Separation

 

“Am I that special to you?” Aryan asked. “You never know”. She replied. Aryan scrolled down the conversation. It has been almost 9 years since he have talked with Arthi. This was the last chat they had. They say ‘Time Machines’ are impossible. But today we have facebook and whatsapp instead of them. They store everything we said, we shared, we did from time to time. So want to see what was it like in the year 2012? Go to that time in facebook or keep scrolling up the chat. Mission accomplished. This chat occurred almost 8 years before. Still Aryan kept those chats not cleared. Aryan’s and Arti’s was same old cliché love story. Aryan often asked “Have I ever said I love you?” “Do we need such boring drama amongst us?” replied Arti. They knew they loved each other. But Aryan was confused about their relation. He wanted to build a life of his dreams where Arti and he can live happily. For that he wanted to go much farther. Arti said “I will not leave you. I don’t want a car, house or luxury. All I want is you.” “Just think Arti, this is for us. For the kids we may have. I want to give them everything. Make them happy. Make you happy.” “Do you think you are making me happy?” Arti asked. “I’m trying to. Try to understand things Arti. Whatever I’m doing it’s for the best.I’m flying to California tomorrow. I may not be able to come for another couple of years. I may not be able to call you or keep in touch with you. But always keep this in mind. This is for us”.

Beginnings are always not good. It was a tough time for Aryan. He worked hard. It was then that the idea of starting a company came into his mind. Within 4 years Aryan became one of the richest amongst California. Time passed. But Arti was still in his mind. But he never tried to contact her. Because he thought attachments are always a hindrance to the growth. Once time was right Aryan came back. His family was waiting for him. They hadn’t see him in a long time,  but he hadn’t seen Arti for longer. He wanted to see her. Invite her to his life. Because he thought this was the right time. He dialled Arti’s number. “Hello this is Arti who is this?” “Have enough time to care for an old friend?” asked Aryan. “Aryan! Oh my god. It has been a long time.” Said Arti. “9 years 4 months and 3 days.” Corrected Aryan. “Why don’t we meet up today evening? I hope we’ve got a lot of things to talk about.” “Uh..yes a lot of things. Why don’t we meet at the beach at 4?” “Fine. I’ll come to pick you.” Said Aryan. “No problem. I can manage.”arti said. Aryan noticed that indifferent tone of her’s. He expected a warm talk just like they used to have before. But this was unexpected. She must’ve been busy with her work. He thought. He was eagerly waiting for this meeting. He has at last accomplished everything he wanted to and now if Arti says yes, then the list is complete.

They were at the beach. This was their usual meeting place. Near the old bridge, which now served as a tourist attraction. There was also a park where they used to spend their weekends, the shop from which they used to buy ice creams. The light house, the restaurant with a lawn opening to the beach, everything was still the same. Except Aryan and Arti. “You have changed a lot Arti.” “Nothing much, except for some extra fat that I own now” said Arti. Yes she had become a little fat than she was when he left. Well it was around 9 years ago. But Arti still had that beautiful face of her unaffected. “Well, Arti let me come to the point. You know there is nothing much in the world that I do not have except you. It was for you I went all the way and came back. Will you be my other half for the rest of my life?” Arti calmly said “No”.

‘Did I hear it wrong? Was she accepting my proposal or was she turning it down by a simple NO. No she didn’t mean it. No way could she let him down. She was his and only his.’ thought Aryan. “I know what you are thinking now.” Started Arti. “I meant what I said. I can’t be yours when I am someone else’s. Where were you all this time? You weren’t there for me when I needed you. I told you I was happy with everything we have. I asked you to stay. You didn’t. Instead you wanted to make money, earn a lot. But what is the use of wealth if you don’t have your loved ones near you? What is it that you value most?” asked Arti. “You and only you”. “No Aryan you are still making a fool out of you. If I was the one you valued most, you wouldn’t have gone abroad in the name of making money. You would’ve stayed here by me, supporting each other.” Aryan kept quiet. He had no justifications to make. Deep inside he knew Arti is right and he is wrong. But still he couldn’t let go of this girl. Arti continued “Do you know anything that happened over the past 9 years? My father passed away. Whole responsibility of the family was on me. Everything was going fine until the recession hit the Indian IT Industry. I was fired from my post. This made the situation worse. None of the companies were ready to hire me. I felt the whole world against me. I became depressed. Spent most of my time in my room. But my mother gave me strength to move on. So I started searching for other jobs. I wanted to stand on my own. I didn’t want to go before any of my relatives begging. I was ready to do any jobs. It was then Vivek came to me with a job offer. Even though it was a start-up I could see an excellent team behind it. Vivek happened to know about my family backgrounds. I didn’t want even a tinge of sympathy from anyone. Vivek knew that. It was like a group of friends working together. So there wasn’t much stress or strain. A perfect place to work. With that team work and leadership of Vivek, the company flourished. Within 3 years the company made a reasonable profit. It was then Vivek had come up with a new project. A group of foreign investors wanted to buy our service. So there was a party at his place. It was then that happened. Vivek just proposed to me. I was not out of my problems. I wanted time. As time went, I made my mind. Vivek was the one for me. While you were running behind money and wealth, Vivek gave me the love you never gave. So yes, we are in a relationship which is about to turn into a marriage.” With that Arti paused.

Aryan was still somewhere else. It took a while for Aryan to come back to the reality. He knew what he had done was wrong. He could now do nothing to turn things back to the time it was perfect. Whatever we may do, whoever we may be fate has something in reserve for us. Only that can happen. He couldn’t say anything. But Aryan did grab some words. “Arti, I’ve always appreciated your choices. I agree with everything you said. I am nowhere to be justified. I’m leaving you to your opinions. Vivek is your man. But know one thing it’s not because I don’t love you. It’s because I still love you. I’ve hurt you many times. I don’t want to hurt you anymore. But know one thing nobody will love you more than I did. All those years spent there were for you. Anyway I’m Happy for you. Live a life you want to. But we’re still friends right?” They smiled. But deep inside Aryan cried.

It was 15 minutes to sunset. The sky had turned red. Sun was about to set. Birds chirped away to their nests, people slowly retreated from sea shore. The beach was almost deserted. They got into Aryan’s car. He had offered a ride home. Aryan waved his hands while leaving her at home. His mind was blank. All his life and dream just set with the sun. He looked outside. A rain was on its way. Within few minutes rain was all over the place. Rain drops almost covered his vision. A lot of questions arose in Aran’s mind. Money was just another piece of paper. Bearing all those questions in his mind, he drove the car. It was raining heavily outside.